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Recipes: Kale & quinoa

And we’re back! I have a new recipe for you this week, and it checks all the boxes: It’s healthy, vegan, affordable, and actually tastes good. Credit for the recipe 100% goes to my best friend’s dad, who is truly one of the best cooks I know.

Okay, but kale? It’s a trend right now, and usually I do not like it. It’s bitter, tough, and I don’t feel like the flavor is worth the health. Except in this recipe. I promise it’s worth a try. It also features quinoa, which is considered a “complete” protein that still gives you some fiber and carbs to fill you up.

This is just a side dish — which is why it’s pictured with rice and a lemon chicken recipe that I have not improved enough to share yet haha — but it’s a grown-up dish that will provide nutrients without tasting like disappointment.

Ingredients:

  • 1 large bunch of kale (6-8 stems)
  • 1/4 cup rainbow or tri-color quinoa
  • 5-8 cloves garlic, crushed
  • olive oil
  • 1/2 lemon
  • salt & pepper to tasteIMG_8770

(You’ll note that there are two kinds of kale here — I prefer the leafy green one to the left, which I got at a farmer’s market, but I needed a little extra and the one to the right was what the store had for organic whole stems. Also the quinoa is that little measuring cup because I buy it in bulk cotton bags, which don’t photograph so well!)

Instructions:

  1. Put dry quinoa into small pot with 1/2 cup water (ratio is always 2 parts water to 1 part quinoa). Bring to a boil, then remove from heat and cover until it’s absorbed all the water. Pro tip: This is also how to cook most white rice on the stovetop.
  2. Wash and pat kale dry. I strongly encourage buying organic if you can afford it, because leafy greens like to hang onto pesticides. If that isn’t in the budget, wash thoroughly in warm water.
  3. De-stem kale, then tear or cut into small pieces. I find this is easiest to do by carefully running a knife along the line between the stem and leaf of each piece of kale, but whatever works for you. As far as final size, just think bite size.
  4. Pour a few tablespoons of oil into a large pan (a wok works best), add in crushed garlic, and heat until shimmery. NOTE: Keep a careful eye on this, and when it’s shimmery it’s done. If the garlic browns too much you’ll have to start over (I might have done that a couple times in the past).img_8771-e1553227453798.jpg
  5. Stir in kale, and cook until dark and wilted. You’ll want to stir regularly during this process.
  6. Remove from heat, and add juice of 1/2 lemon.
  7. Mix in quinoa.
  8. Serve and enjoy!IMG_8772

Cost about $7, makes 3 large or 4 small servings.

This was my third time making this recipe, and I’ve almost got it down pat. Here are two of the keys: not cooking the garlic too much, and cooking the kale enough. Burned garlic is a travesty. Shimmery, and stop. Cooking the kale, as well as adding the acid from the lemon, is what breaks down the bitterness in the kale. And of course, if you’re wary of the veggie taste, you can always add more garlic or lemon!

It doesn’t make a ton, but it’s plenty for a few people for dinner or for a few days of meal prep. It’s also so healthy without leaving you hungry in like an hour. You can also sub some of the kale for baby spinach, just add it in later since it cooks faster.

What are your favorite veggie dishes? Let me know in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and happy adulting!

P.S. Sorry the pic is real chicken-focused — I thought I’d be sharing both recipes but it’s just not ready yet. It at least shows a nice pairing for this killer side dish 😉

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A little change (or a lot)

Some exciting news — I started a new job this week! The last month has been full of some quite bad and lots of very good things, and there will be more updates coming, but I’m excited to finally be able to share the news.

And, of course, to share the lesson I learned: Sometimes change is the most needed when you least expect it. I really enjoyed my previous job, and many of the people there. But my new coworkers are also amazing, and I’m stoked about the opportunities to grow and learn in my new role.

While I like to think I’m good at handling change, I’m not always the most comfortable with it (there’s a reason my adult apartment has the same couch my parents wanted to get rid of when I was 7). I’m deeply sentimental, like things to be organized and predictable, and am a real big fan of my comfort zone. But that’s not usually where progress happens.

Enter, change. My gut instinct is usually a little better at signing on board for adventures and quality changes than my worry-prone brain. The trick is listening to both, and deciding who deserves a stronger say in the situation at hand. And that right there is one of the great balances we’re all trying to learn as emerging adults: when to trust our gut or our head, when to take a chance or play it safe.

There’s no perfect rule of thumb, and making a flowchart would be impossible. Your guess is as good as mine. As long as it’s an educated guess, and you’ve done your research and prep, you’ll probably land on your feet. I’ve shared some things that help me when it comes to assessing change and making big decisions.

Today I just want to offer some encouragement. A year ago or even 2 months ago, I didn’t know I’d be where I’m at now. And it’s a time that is exceptionally busy and full of challenges. But it’s also full of some of the most genuine happiness I can imagine, and the opportunity for so many wonderful things to come.

I don’t know where you’re at, or what big life moments you’re facing (or will be soon). But I know you can handle them. After all, you’ve made it this far.

I’d love to hear any encouraging words you guys have to offer in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and happy adulting!

(Photo is a free stock photo because this is how I imagine new opportunities.)

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It all comes down to organizing

As I’ve been not-so-subtly hinting at, life has been a little chaotic over here lately. Normally, I’m very on top of my schedule, like to be early to both attending and completing things, and don’t have too much trouble keeping track of most of what needs to be remembered.

Lately, that’s been less the case. But as much as life being busy makes that understandable, it doesn’t make it sustainable. So I’ve had to put in some extra effort on my usual methods of organization. I tend to be a highly organized person, but rarely feel that way.

And of course, not every organization tool works for everyone. Planners worked great for me in high school, but eventually my to-do list became more complex in terms of deadlines and priorities and a planner no longer suited my needs. It’s just a matter of finding what works for you.

For the when and where

  • Paper calendar or planner. I’m still a big advocate for physical calendars or planners whenever possible. In part it’s because I’m a pretty kinesthetic person, and in part because writing this down actually helps with comprehension and memory.
  • Digital calendar. Of course, analog doesn’t work for everyone. If you’re constantly on the go, or just know you’d never look at a paper one, use your phone or computer to input your schedule and any important events and set up reminders so you’re always prepared for them.

For the to-do list

  • A little black book. Seriously, this is what I have kept my to-do list in for the last 5.5 years, and it’s worked great. It’s small enough to travel with me, and provides the memory benefit of actually writing down the thing I need to do.
  • Temporarily, any random scrap of paper. If it’s just a day-of list, I’ll often write my stuff on a post-it note and cross out tasks as I accomplish them. It still provides the ease of writing things down but gives me a little more flexibility and room for detail in day-to-day tasks.
  • There’s always digital. If paper isn’t handy or I’ll be moving around enough that I’m likely to lose track of a piece of paper, then I usually opt for my phone. The Notes app on iPhone actually has a “list” option that puts little bubbles to the left of each line so you can check off things as you do them. This is also my preference for the grocery list because, again, a single piece of paper is harder to keep track of.

For dude, you cannot forget this

  • A reminder or alarm on your phone. I have a few recurring reminders set to water plants and pay my bills, and they just make things easy when I’m busy and might have lost track of time.
  • Ask a friend to help you remember. It doesn’t always work, but even if they don’t remind you, saying it aloud is sometimes all you need to remember on your own.
  • The “item out of place” trick. One of my moms taught me this one a while back: You put something odd in a noticeable place (e.g. a picture frame in the kitchen or a pen on your pillow) and mentally link that thing to whatever you’re supposed to remember. Then when you see it, you get reminded.
  • The “on top of whatever you won’t forget” trick. If all else fails, you can put the thing you’re supposed to remember on top of something you wouldn’t go without, like your wallet, phone, or keys. It’s a pretty tried-and-true method of ensuring you’ve got everything you need.

For you need to know where this is

  • Filing, filing, filing. Y’all, this is not negotiable. Do you know where your most important documents are (birth certificate, ID, tax stuff, medical info)? Because when you need it, chances are you aren’t going to want to go searching for it. Buy a small file box and make a folder for important categories like the ones I mentioned above. Then when the time comes, you know where to find it.
  • A safe. If you’re worried or just want to be extra secure, you can get a small safe to house important papers. Just note that unless you buy one specifically designed for it, many safes aren’t waterproof or fireproof (and those that are usually have time limits that they can sustain that stress).
  • Give stuff a home. I used to be terrible about keeping track of small stuff I use frequently, like my earbuds, until I assigned them a “home.” Now, they are either with me or in a particular pocket of my purse. Once in a while I still stick them in a jacket pocket or somewhere random, but it’s far less often.

What tools have you found to help stay organized? Let me know in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and happy adulting!

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Just roll with it

I’ve spent more time than I can count looking out at the ocean, but it’s always mattered more to me when I’m in it. A few times, swimming near the break, I’ve been rolled in a wave. It’s a pure-instinct terror, no matter how well you know the right steps. But when you are quite literally flipped end over end, the only thing that matters is getting your head above water.

We, as humans, have a remarkable ability to detect which was is up even when we feel like we’ve got no clue. So you push, and find the surface. And nothing feels as wonderful as that first breath. Until the next wave hits.

But this time, hopefully, you were ready and scanning, and can dive mostly under the impact. More breaths. Eventually, you make enough progress to move in past the break and then the waves can actually help you to shore.

Of course, I’m not just trying to teach a water safety course here (though seriously, don’t mess around with the ocean — she is unpredictable). Life can feel that way for a lot of us sometimes. It definitely has for me lately.

The last couple of weeks have been… a lot. Like, story-all-about-how-my-life-got-flipped-turned-upside-down a lot. But minus the sitcom happy ending every half-hour. I could’ve crumbled. I felt like it on several occasions. I could’ve acted like everything was fine. I’m not very convincing at that. So instead, I’m trying to be as honest as possible about how chaotic life can sometimes feel, even when you know that ultimately you’ll be okay.

Sometimes adulting is about just putting one foot in front of the other, even when it’s hard, and even when every part of you wants to be laying on the floor and avoiding complete sentences. There is, of course, a balance to trying and giving yourself room to rest and to breathe. But the only way out is through — even if progress takes a while.

So here’s to every step forward, every second with your head above water. Here’s to facing the next wave, and knowing you’re strong enough to swim through.

A lot of folks I know are dealing with a lot right now, so instead of a question to wrap up, I’d love it if you took a moment to post a small encouragement or a quote that’s helped you persevere in the comments below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up. Thanks for reading, and good luck adulting!

P.S. This pic is from my favorite beach in the whole world — the water is very cold, but it’s held some of my best memories.

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I accidentally went on a health kick

That headline is 100% serious. I am (for myself) firmly against diets and not really into New Year’s resolutions. But somehow over the last month, a variety of small choices and practices have developed into a fairly holistic health focus — probably the best I’ve done in that area a while. This was all spurred by a variety of motivations that all center on the idea of health: for my body, for my head/heart, and for the planet.

This post should probably start with a disclaimer that this post is a lot more “me-focused” than I usually go for here. None of these things are meant to be prescriptive, but hopefully they spark ideas regarding how you can prioritize health in your own life.

Physical

  • Going to yoga class with my best friend (almost) every week. That’s tonight (yay)! I’m not big on group exercise, but attending yoga classes has been sooooo beneficial for my muscles, stress, and overall well-being.
  • Trying to walk and generally move around more. Especially since winter weather restricts most of the exercise I like to do, this one has proven challenging. But I’m doing alright with it, and it will get easier as the weather warms.
  • Paying attention to my muscles and the ridiculous levels of tension they build up. I carry stress in my neck and shoulders, and boy does it stack up. A few at-home tools to help get knots and tension out — as well as stretching throughout the day and occasional massages — have really helped. Oh, and lowering my dang shoulders whenever I notice they’re up by my ears.
  • Getting enough sleep. This is one to be careful about because oversleeping can be harmful, but if I’ve done everything I need to do and feel really tired or sleepy, I just let myself rest.

Mental and emotional

  • Engaging more intentionally in conversations, and bringing extra kindness to interactions. Especially as an introvert, I’d sometimes like to ignore the existence of the outside world instead of putting in the effort to engage with it. But I know how much small kindnesses from other people brighten my day, and I’m trying to get better about doing the same thing.
  • Listening to a poem on my morning commute as a meditation of sorts. There are also apps and other methods of doing this, but I’ve found this is the easiest one for me to be consistent with.
  • Reading anything I want. Sometimes it’s an article or Twitter thread, but I’ve actually blown through several books in the last few weeks (much faster than my rate the last few years) because I stopped bothering with what I should be reading and just started reading stuff I felt like reading. (Surrendering to the idea of reading two books at once also helped this.)
  • Noticing when I feel anxious or drained, and responding to that. Sometimes life or my brain or who knows what other factors get to me more than I’d like. This is less of a recent thing, and more another step in the long process of learning to identify how I’m feeling and what’s behind that, to talk myself through it and reach out for help as needed, and to be patient with the reminder that it will get better and I’ve got what it takes to keep going.

Nutrition

  • Drinking more water. I really can’t emphasize how big of a difference this one makes for me. Seriously, my skin is clearer, I get fewer headaches, and I have more energy. My body needs way more water than I used to give it, and making sure I always have a cup or my reusable water bottle on hand means I don’t have excuses not to.
  • Eating more vegetables and less junk food. I like dessert. I still eat it when I want to. But making sure I toss veggies into at least 1-2 meals a day and switching to a healthier breakfast (a grainy bread, toasted with almond butter) have made it easier to over-processed foods and junk I don’t need to be eating.
  • I gave up meat one day a week. This is less for personal health reasons than environmental ones — meat production takes a big toll on the environment, which humanity has done a pretty crap job taking care of the last 200 years. I love steak and burgers and bacon, and haven’t given them up completely. But intentionally not eating meat 1 day a week (it’s really only in about half my meals anyway), and swapping in more sustainable options when possible — like turkey tacos instead of ground beef — is a step I know I can do to help protect the planet we can’t afford to lose.

These are small things, but they add up to a big difference. I know what it’s like to work to the bone and to not take care of myself, and I’ve let that pull me down too many times. What works for you might be a mix of these things, or involve something totally different. The most important thing is to make sure it’s a healthy practice for where you’re at, and to remind yourself that it doesn’t have to happen all at once.

What small things have you done to take better care of yourself and your surroundings? Let me know in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and happy adulting!

(Photo is a free stock photo because this is the kind of stuff that motivates me to stick with the whole health thing.)

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Rejection happens

We’ve all experienced it, likely in a few forms. Whether it was school applications, job applications or interviews, a dating prospect, a leadership position, or something else entirely. You can’t win ‘em all. The trick is learning how to take the L.

I’ll be the first to confess that I’m not awesome with rejection. I got in to the (very few, not moonshot) colleges I applied to, but rejected for most of the scholarships. I got snubbed a few times by guys I was into. I applied for 61 jobs before getting hired at my current position. Knowing that it’s normal doesn’t make it suck any less.

Of course, the more invested someone is in something, the more rejection stings, and I tend to be the kind of person who invests pretty heavily in things that are important to me. Still, I’ve gotten better with it in my emerging adult years, and have found a few tricks that help:

Manage expectations. This is not me saying to be a pessimist, or insist that it won’t happen to try and protect yourself from possible rejection. But it can be helpful to remind yourself that it may not work out. If possible, especially with things like college/grad school and job applications, you can do a little research regarding response and acceptance rates to inform what your odds of success might be. (That being said, if doing that only freaks you out, don’t do it.)

Diversify. Or don’t put all your eggs in one basket, or whatever other pithy sound byte you want to use there. The point is that it is very, very rarely a good idea to put all you’ve got in terms of resources into one chance. By all means, put in all your effort, but don’t call in all your favors or put all your hope in the one thing if you know there’s a significant chance of it not working out.

It usually isn’t personal. Sometimes people are mean, and really do make rejection personal and unnecessarily hurtful. But usually, they’re just saying they don’t think what you’re looking for is the right fit, whether that’s a job possibility, date, or submission for publication. And even if it felt personal, there is zero excuse for you to be a jerk or take the loss out on someone, whether they were involved or not.

If you see a pattern, there might be a problem. The problem could be on your end or the other party’s, but if rejection persists and repeatedly doesn’t make sense, it might be time to re-examine. Maybe you need to change your approach or figure out what thing they’re looking for that you might not have. Maybe the timing is wrong. Though I would caution to never jump to this as a first conclusion, it’s also worth being aware that some level of discrimination may be a factor. Unfortunately, there are always hurdles, but figuring out what they are is the first part of getting past them.

It’s not the end. It might be the end of that opportunity, but you might get another shot at it later on. Even if you don’t, there are other opportunities out there. There are a thousand and one success stories that were preceded by piles of rejection. It might take a lot of tries, but it only has to work once.

What are your tips for handling rejection? Let me know in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and good luck adulting!

(Photo is a free stock photo because it’s a weird thing to visualize.)

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23

Music means the world to me. It grounds me, gives me something to hold onto, offers new perspectives and reminders I need, gives me a hug when no one else is around, and takes me home no matter how far I feel.

So for my birthday last year, I published a playlist that encapsulated the music that had meant the most to me over the course of that year. Not only was it fun (and a nice break from regular adulting), but it gave me a new way to reflect and process, as well as something that I really enjoyed going back to. Based on all of that, I decided to make it a bit of a tradition.

Same rules as before: a playlist of the songs that have meant the most to me over the last year, one song for every year I’ve been around, and they’re in listening order — not order of significance. And, of course, I’ve included a link to the playlist on Spotify if you feel like giving it a listen!

  1. Hard Times – Paramore
  2. Dark Blue – Jack’s Mannequin
  3. Dear World – Echosmith
  4. Dirty and Left Out – The Almost
  5. Send Me Home – Asking Alexandria
  6. Buried Beneath – Red
  7. Hunger – Florence + The Machine
  8. Man of Stone – Matthew Thiessen & The Earthquakes
  9. Avalanche – Bring Me The Horizon
  10. Zombie – Bad Wolves
  11. Letters to God, Pt II – Angels & Airwaves
  12. Heavydirtysoul – Twenty One Pilots
  13. LA Devotee – Panic! At The Disco
  14. Last Hope – Paramore
  15. Vice Verses – Switchfoot
  16. Start A Riot – BANNERS
  17. Better Days – The Goo Goo Dolls
  18. Hallelujah – Rufus Wainwright
  19. Vindicated – Dashboard Confessional
  20. Don’t Let It Pass – Junip
  21. Found/Tonight – Ben Platt and Lin-Manuel Miranda
  22. The Best – Tina Turner
  23. Empress – Snow Patrol

What songs have been stuck with you lately? Let me know in a comment below, on Twitter @ohgrowup, or Instagram @oh.grow.up! Thanks for reading, and happy adulting!

P.S. I know there’s a duplicate from last year. I was going to change it, but honestly it’s still earned its spot.